About the alien invasion predicted for December 3, 2024:
First, the good news for
those hardcore NHI believers and fans of ufology on social media and popular
podcasts.
It happened as predicted.
You were right.
The bad news is that you
missed it.
I had been taking my daily
morning walk along a snowy path in a field in Charleswood, Manitoba, when a dazzling
light shone down from the sky onto a patch of exposed grass near me. Onto this
patch of hard soil and vegetation landed a domed, saucer-shaped vehicle about
35 feet in diameter and 15 feet in height. The craft seemed metallic, with no
apparent seams or rivets, but took on the appearance of burnished brass or
aluminum.
Suddenly, a small door
opened in the side of the space vehicle (for what else could it have been?) and
out of it emerged a small, strange creature. Not the usual almond-eyed grey
that many see, nor like an insect, nor an armored thing like a Predator. But it
was more like a small, furry dwarf—skinnier and more articulated than an Ewok, and not green
like Yoda but kind of beige color with an eggshell-like texture to its skin.
(It was naked, except for what looked like purple swimming trunks on its lower
body.)
It marched up to me and I
was shocked to hear it say in perfect English (with a bit of a Scottish accent,
for some reason): “Stand still, Earthling, for your planet is being invaded as I
speak! I am Kotorg, Advance Sentry of the Imperial Commander from the planet
Ixbez, and I am here to prepare the way for our Strike Force. Your planet will
be destroyed and humans will suffer greatly!”
I was quite taken aback by
this diminutive alien and did as it obeyed, for I noted it was holding a device
in one of its hands: a potato-shaped thing with a nozzle pointing in my direction,
and I didn’t want to get zapped or disintegrated.
“As the first Earthling we
have encountered, you will be instrumental in conveying our orders to others on
your planet,” it intoned in a high-pitched, yet raspy voice. “Take me to your
leader!”
Surprised by hearing such
a comedic line, I asked, “Which one?”
The little alien seemed
puzzled by my reply, and retorted, “What do you mean? There is no one who speaks
for your planet?”
I then patiently explained
that at the moment there was a leader in our country, but a leader-elect in another,
with a different leader currently in power.
I continued: “Of course,
there are leaders of individual towns and cities, and leaders of states and
provinces, and leaders of other countries around. You may have meant to ask
about spiritual leaders, of which there is one in Rome, but also in Iran,
London, China, and Japan, not to mention hundreds of other faiths.
“You might also have meant
the most prominent head of our society, which at the moment is a popular entertainer
on tour and whom millions adore.
“Or perhaps a military
leader, of which there are many in individual countries and cantons around the
world. Many of these are at the moment engaged in war with each other, dropping
bombs and attacking citizens with missiles and warheads, laying waste to the
Earth itself. In fact, there is concern that a nuclear device used in an
offensive attack could level all of Earth.
“Naturally, Earthlings
have created a society where individuals can express dissatisfaction with leadership
and petition for better services and programs to preserve flora and fauna—and humans. Unfortunately, humans are fickle and tend
to make poor choices, so that our oceans are polluted, our air is fouled by carbon
and smog, and we value life only minimally.”
I paused, then asked, “So to
whom would you like to be taken?”
The fuzzy alien stared at me,
then looked back over its shoulder to the disc-shaped spaceship. It turned again to
me and said: “Never mind. You Earthlings are already in the process of destroying
your planet and making one another suffer. Our invasion is hardly necessary. We
will be back in a billion or your years to invade the next civilization that
will rise after yours has collapsed and vanished.”
And with that, the little
creature climbed back aboard its flying saucer, The door closed and it took off
into outer space.
I suppose the invasion was
cancelled.
I continued on with my
walk, enjoying the brisk December air. When I returned home, I checked social
media to see what was new.
I wonder what posts will
be trending today.
Labels: alien, invasion, NHI, UAP, UFO
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